Archives for March 2017

03.30.17

We Want To Hear Your “Real Life” Story!

My Fear Antidote wants to hear your real life story

We want to hear your about your real life. We all have our life story to tell…What’s yours?

We are so thrilled to start a new campaign on our blog called “Real Life” and we want YOU to be apart of it! Every Wednesday we will post someones Real Life Story. How exciting right?

Your story you share can be about your triumphs, your struggles, your fears, or even what’s working for you. We want to hear about your REAL life. Even if you want to email us a daily routine you stick to that helps make your life easier. Whatever it is we want to hear from you guys!

We personally think that we all need reminders that we are in this crazy thing called life together, and what a better reminder than hearing someone else struggles, triumphs, fears and joys!

There is a saying that when you are brave enough to be vulnerable you give others permission to be vulnerable too. Also, you find through others story that your not alone in your fight. Your story may touch someones life in a way that our blog can’t. Your story may inspire someone to try harder. Your story may change someones life. So be BRAVE and VULNERABLE and share your story with us!

Moms and Dads reading this, if you would like to share your child’s story of struggle, triumph, fears or joys we would love to hear that too. You can also share what has helped for your child struggling with anxiety, depression, an eating disorder or any other mental health issue.

SO…Email us your story at myfearantidote@gmail.com and we will feature one story every Wednesday. You must be 18 years old or older to be able to share your story. We ask that you please be respectful in your language use as well.

We are so excited about this and can’t wait to hear from you guys! Once you email us, we will email you back and give you a heads up on when  your story will be featured on our blog.

XOXO

Sarah and Megan

 

 

03.28.17

The Detours in Our Lives – Finding Strength in our Trials

The Unexpected Trail to Notch Peak – Taking the Wrong Trail and Finding Strength

Notch Peak Trailhead

Last weekend, my husband, my brother-in-law, and I all went down to western Utah to climb Notch Peak. We carefully examined the trails maps before hand, packed our bags with water and food, and set out for a beautiful day. From the very beginning of the hike, there were astounding views. We could not take our eyes off the sheer canyon walls and the beautiful jagged peaks that surrounded us.

After about a mile of hiking, we realized that we were hiking up a creek bed, and not on a trail. The creek bed was beginning to have thick sections of overgrown shrubs, and steep inclines of loose rock. We stopped to gather our surroundings and figure out where we went wrong. Instead of turning back and finding the trail (like a smart person would have done), we decided to bushwhack our way up a ridge and continue on the ridge until it curved around to the peak. It seemed like a brilliant plan. We were sure once we were on the ridge we would see the trail and find a way to meet up with it so that we could summit Notch Peak. Up and up we went, our legs and arms scratched by evil trees that did not want to let us pass.

That Lovely Ridge…

At first, it seemed like a fun adventure; blazing our own trails and fighting through the wilderness. After awhile the trees grew thick, and a times we found ourselves in knee-deep snow. As we made our way across the ridge, we realized that there was no way we would be able to summit Notch Peak from the side of the mountain we were on, and the only way to the other side was a very steep gully covered in deep wet snow. I found myself feeling so angry that we had wasted so much time. We should have turned around before we got so far away from our destination.

Deep Unanticipated Snow

Instead of turning around and giving up, we decided to summit a peak that was close to us called Sawtooth Mountain. We hadn’t planned on this destination, but it was still a beautiful view. As we stood on that mountain, we looked to the south and could see Notch peak. We were surprised to see 5 or 6 tiny specks moving around on top… there were people up there! We could not imagine how they had made it up there… what direction did they go?

The Top – Notch Peak In the Background

As we bushwhacked our way down the mountain, I kept wondering where had we gone wrong. Eventually we made it back to the creek bed we were in, and continued to our car. As we neared the beginning of the trail, we came across several large boulders that spanned the width of the trail. The boulders were intersecting our trail (creek bed) and directing hikers in the actual direction of the trail. I looked a few feet down the trail and saw Cairns pointing the correct direction to go. I was so bewildered… How did we miss this! We had stepped over HUGE boulders in order to take the wrong trail.

As I have thought about that hike the past few days, I realized it is a lot like life. We set out on this path, this life we have planned for ourselves, and we feel so excited in imagining our possibilities. However, sometimes we get too distracted with the things that are not our goals. The sheer canyon walls grab out attention, and we stop paying attention to the trail.

For me, my eating disorder began in a similar way. I became consumed with doing everything I could to be loved and admired by the world, and lost sight of the importance of being loved and admired by God. I stepped over boulders self love and happiness, and began dieting and restricting, thinking that being skinny would make me happy and loved. Eventually I realized I was on the wrong trail. I  fought through thick shrubs, and emerged battered and bruised. Instead of enjoying the smooth clear trail that led to the peak, I took a huge detour in becoming the person I wanted to be. The journey was no longer fun, and at times, I was scarily close to giving up. I kept wishing I had never lost the trail.

I kept thinking about this analogy and it made me sad. Then I realized that I had summited a peak, a beautiful peak. I was there with people I love. We took wonderful pictures and had a wonderful time together. We had a hard hike, but that hike made us strong and more prepared for next time. I thought about that in my own life… Although I took a wrong trail, I made it to a peak. It may not have been my initial destination, but I believe that along the way I learned valuable lessons that God needed me to learn. I grew in my strength in overcoming hard things. My abilities to love and understand flourished. I changed for the better because of that wrong trail.

Sometimes the “should haves,” and “I wish I could haves” rule our thoughts.

Sometimes we can only see the negative in our situations; we can only see the foolishness in stepping over those boulders and getting so distracted from our plans. But our plans are not always what God has planned for us, and living in the past will only take our focus from the bright future we have ahead.

The Top with the One I Love Most

We go through struggles and take detours on the path for a reason. Think about how you have grown from your struggles. I know I would never trade what I have gone through, because I have changed in ways that I know God needed me to. Today, think about the reasons you are grateful for your depression, or your eating disorder, or your anxiety. What have you learned from your journey so far? Now, keep your chin up and keep moving forward, because I know you can make it to that peak.

XOXO

 

Megan

 

03.24.17

Kid 101- Encouraging Self Esteem in Kids

Encouraging self esteem in kids is something near and dear to my heart. I don’t know if it because my kids make my world go ’round or I fear what they might possibly face as they get older. Whatever it is I want them to have the strongest self esteem possible. Raising them in the world today scares me to death. As their mom, I feel like it is my responsibility to raise them and teach them to love themselves, in a world that is constantly preaching to them the exact opposite.

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03.23.17

How About We Take a Look at Real Life…My Life.

Are  you ready for this look at my real life?

Like I said before, self love and I have a love/hate relationship. Our relationship has really struggled on and off for years, probably since I was a 9th grader. I based my self love primarily off of my physical appearance. If my hair was done perfectly, if my clothes were in style and if they fit just right.

After I Had my second baby, I would spend 2 hours a day at the gym and eat super healthy. I thought I was “happy” because my size 3 jeans fit and I was in great shape.

Don’t get me wrong these things aren’t bad, but these things were what I based my happiness off of. This was my skewed reality until I got pregnant with my third child and my life came crumbling down.

Let me paint you a picture of what was going on in my life and hopefully some of you can relate to some part of my story.

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03.22.17

The Love Challenge

Alright guys! Who is ready for a little SELF-LOVIN’

This idea or concept is something most of us struggle with. I personally have a love/hate relationship with this concept, mostly because I have struggled with loving myself since I was in 9th grade or maybe even earlier.

I remember when I was probably 10 years old a neighbor girl making fun of my dark full eyebrows. Mind you I loved my eyebrows until she started teasing me. I was so embarrassed by her comments that I came home and took matters into my own hands. I shaved my eyebrows… yep you read that right! SHAVED THEM!! My mom found out and taught me a very important lesson that day. A lesson that has stuck with me, it doesn’t matter what others think of you, or your eyebrows. what matters is what you think of yourself.

I wish I could go back to my 10 year old self at that moment when she started teasing me and stand up for myself and tell her how much I loved my eyebrows and that I didn’t care what she thought because I loved who I was and what I looked like. I wish I could tell my 10 year old self to keep that love I had for myself strong, I know it would have spared me a lot of grief in the future. I would also tell that neighbor girl that one day my eyebrows would be totally in style 🙂 What would you go back and tell your 10 year old self?

In our last two blog post from Megan she talked about the importance of filling your bucket and loving yourself for being you. She talked about not banking on the love or acceptance of others to make you feel fulfilled and happy. Right?

SOOOOO……

I have created a fun “challenge” to get you really thinking and hopefully realizing how amazing you are, dark full eyebrows and all!

You’ll need some simple items to do this challenge

  • a journal
  • a pen or pencil

and then at least 10 minutes a day. You can easily spend more time than 10 minutes on this, but 10 minutes is the minimum. Be real. Be true to yourself while doing this challenge and I promise you’ll find things you love about you that you didn’t know existed!

Drum roll please….

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03.21.17

You Can’t Be Everyone’s Everything

Are You Loved By You…..?

Have you ever seen the Fault In Our Stars? One of my favorite quotes comes from that movie. One of the characters is dying, and is SO mad that he isn’t famous or hasn’t made a huge difference in the world. Then his girlfriend says this…

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03.20.17

Everybody Has A Green Tie – Finding Self Love and Self Acceptance

At the heart of every eating disorder is a core issue. In treatment you learn that someone’s core issue is a negative self-belief validated by negative life experiences. I like to think of this as the reason deep down that someone is acting the way they are. What many people don’t know is that everyone, mental illness or not, has a core issue, or a core belief, that drives their actions.

I have been seeing a counselor, or therapist, since I was 16 years old. In that time I have come to understand my own core issue, as well as realize that many people’s core issues, or core beliefs, are the same as mine. To illustrate this, I want to share a story.

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03.17.17

10 simple ways to step out of your comfort zone

We have come up with a list of 10 simple ways that may help you step out of your comfort zone. Some may seem a little crazy or even out of the ordinary but we all heal different, we are all challenged by different things. One of these ideas may help you when the others might not. Give one or two of them a try and see if any help!

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03.16.17

Creating Your Support Group – The First Step in Getting Out of Your Comfort Zone

Imagine you are stuck hanging from the edge of a cliff. Below lies a 1,000-foot drop. The sun is beating down on your skin, and beads of sweat start to form and drip. Your hands are starting to cramp. You don’t know how much longer you can hold on. Your mouth is dry and begging for water. Your skin is beginning to sunburn. You feel like giving up. Maybe it would be so much easier just to let go? Would anyone even notice? Then you start hearing people walking around on the ledge. They are carrying all sorts of tools that can help you; ropes, carabineers, and knowledge about how to pull yourself off the face of the cliff. You may not know it, but some of them have even been in your exact position! You think about calling out for help, but suddenly feel ashamed of the position you are in. What if they think you are stupid for being stuck on this cliff? What if they think less of me for not being to pull myself up? The shame overtakes you. You think that nobody will understand how you got to this dyer point on the edge of a cliff, you even think that the ropes and tools they have probably wont help you. So, you keep your mouth shut, and you continue to hang, hoping to muster the strength and knowledge of how to pull yourself off the cliff alone.

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03.15.17

STEPPING OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE

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